Much like genital herpes, Enthroned simply will not go away. It seems like these Belgian Black Metallers put a new album out every month. Well, before it sounds like I’m coming down on them too hard, I probably ought to tell you that this is by far their best album since 1997’s Toward the Skullthrone of Satan. It completely shatters the third-rate-version-of-Immortal mold they were casting for themselves by releasing a string of uninteresting, monotonous albums. Sabathan’s trollish Black Metal squeal has never sounded so venomous, this is the best production they’ve ever achieved, and standout tracks like “Crimson Legions” (complete with intro from Aleister Crowley), “Daemon’s Claw,” and “Night Stalker” may be the greatest songs they’ve ever written. There’s still a noteworthy amount of fast filler, but without question Xes Haereticum is a big step in the right direction for the band. Now, if they can just keep it up. We’ll probably have to wait until at least June to find out.

I’m not sure if these guys have undergone serious lineup changes, but this is hardly the same Engorged. Their patented style of Powerviolence, Death Metal, and Grindcore has been disturbingly shaken up. This is more of a fast, heavy, Old School Thrash that I see as a huge step down from the unique blend of extremity they had trademarked for themselves. They have not completely abandoned Death and Grind, but the overall result is sadly sterile, as the most intense moments here could not get half the adrenaline flowing that even the filler on Death Metal Attack 2 or their self-titled album on Necropolis/Deathvomit could. Tracks like “Werewolf Militia” even have a Death n’ Roll feel that quite frankly does not work. The vocal style is also radically different. The crazed, varied Spazz-like vocal insanity is gone, and in its place is a Death snarl, that while decent, like so much of this album, it just isn’t Engorged. Luckily there are still the gang vocals, albeit they do seem to have less bite. The most brutal vocal moment on this album by far belongs to Lord Gore’s Gurge on “Chaingang,” which also features Rob Fornicator. The lyrics here are just plain goofy. Not that these G.I. Joe-obsessed freaks have ever had the most serious subject matter, but giant squids and pirate ships? What is this, 1850? An extreme letdown from a band whose deranged originality had really set them apart.

Cheap, embarrassingly produced, middle-of-the-road Black Metal from Norway. Traces of Old School German Thrash are also evident, but that’s not enough to save this 3-song demo/CD from mediocrity. As much as I worship at the altar of Darkthrone, whenever something comes highly recommended from them it tends to be a disappointment. First Impiety, now this. It makes me a tad hesitant to try anything from their newly formed Tyrant Syndicate label (where it wouldn’t surprise me to see Endsum end up). Sad and strange how a demo from an up-and-coming Norwegian Black Metal band does not command the same amount of interest or attention as it would have 10-12 years ago.

Do me a favor, if you’re going to call your band Emptiness, could you please make the music depressing? You see, my life is uneventful and meaningless, so I’m often in the mood for something despondent. Rarely am I in the mood for easily forgettable experimental Grind that sounds like Benumb on cheaper crack. However, if that’s your bag, here it is.

Before I get to the music, I’d like to point out that a track listing somewhere in the layout is generally a good idea. Speaking of ideas, Eminence have borrowed a few from the likes of mid-era Napalm Death, Gorefest, and Sepultura (which shouldn’t come as a surprise considering this band features ex-Sepultura guitarist and founding member, Jairo Guedz on bass). While not quite in the same league, this is still impressive with its great production, heavy guitar sound, and gruff but understandable Cavalera-style snarl. While far from groundbreaking and occasionally dull, it is for the most part well-executed and often enjoyable to listen to.

With a name like Elite, you’ve got to be good or else people are going to give you shit about it. To tell you the truth, Elite might be good at playing their instruments, but they’re not very original. This is a band that is clearly drinking the well-waters of Transilvanian Hunger to the point where outside of the missing tape hiss, this could have easily been Darkthrone back in that time period. According to the inlay, this was recorded live in the studio, and it really has that “live” feel to it. There are parts of this album that make it almost sound like a very high quality rehearsal tape burned onto CD. The rawness helps, as does the fact that they actually left some of the bass in their guitars. Kampen is a fairly straight-forward album, no frills, no twists, just Black Fucking Metal. If your Transilvanian Hunger hasn’t been satisfied and you’re desperate for more of the same, Elite will probably satisfy your basic cravings. Rehashing Darkthrone might make you “cult” but if you want to be “elite,” you’re going to have to step it up another notch.

Let’s be honest, a lot of the bands on Napalm are horrible, so I wasn’t expecting too much from Elis. I mean, does the world, much less Napalm, really need yet one more Gothic Metal band with a chick singer? The more aggressive moments on this album might actually make me say “yes!” if not for the spun-sugar stuff, which is about enough to induce diabetes. Still, the good bits tend to be really good, somewhat like a combination of Sinergy and Darkwell. But the rest will rot your brain.

What the fuck was that opening scream? Was it the singer’s little sister getting punched in the cunt? Oh hell, it wasn’t… That’s not good. I guess that these dudes want to be a combination of Judas Priest and Helloween, with the dumber lyrical content of Manowar thrown in. A lot of bands aspire to worse, I suppose. And musically this can be pretty good, with stunning production throughout. But this singer… It’s not even that he’s terrible; for this style, he’s okay. But he has a very annoying habit of exhaling really loudly after every line he sings, so that even the good lyrics are turned into “I signed -huhh- a contract with The Devil -huhh-.” That’s from the title track, which I kind of like in a guilty-pleasure way, despite eye-rolling lyrics like “The only thing I want / Is what my parents don’t.” At least, like UDO, these guys worship Metal as their only religion (or claim to, anyway), which gets them a little extra credit. But the lyrics are so dorky that even the aforementioned Manowar guys would be embarrassed to be caught singing along (and they have lyrics like “Then I run back to the power rack, and deck all of my gear”). And that’s all just the first song. By the time that we get to the third track, the gayness of the lyrics is too over-the-top for me, and I am unable to stand hearing crap like “Hit me with the sledge of Rock.” And it just gets worse from there, degenerating into Grim Reaper, Ozzy, and beyond territory, musically. They probably lift riffs from Ratt and Poison for all I know. And they even rip off their own songs, reusing the same riffs here and there… I am told that if you were to actually be masochistic enough to pay for this, it comes with a “making of” DVD. I shudder to think what that must be like.

This band had already participated in the act of creating some of the most ferociously heavy Death Metal known to man or beast, but on this, their third full length album, Drawn and Quartered have achieved complete perfection. Their demonically brutal sound has descended to the cavernous depths reserved only for legends like Morbid Angel, Immolation, Vital Remains, and Blood Ritual. This album simply has no flaws. It flows with sadistic emotion, from its hyper-speed adrenaline surges to the moments of diabolical crawl. Each song is a weapon, with a deep vocal attack in league with Ross Dolan. The riff writing and song structuring have just been honed to a razor-sharp tee, reminding this elated Death Metal buff of the sheer entertainment value of music that sounds authentically evil. Someone who tells you that Death Metal’s glory days are over should be played this album, then shot.

This CD is one of those “limited edition for die-hard collectors only” releases that eBay surfers love to hate. Draugwath released a demo back in 1995 and then changed their name to BlackDeath. Since changing their name, BlackDeath has released three albums and a number of lesser releases. Now that their “cult” status is firmly established, demand for their old demo material has arisen and with that, you have the Dwellers of the Cursed Forest limited edition (500 copies only…) CD pressing. Musically, Draugwath sounds a lot like Von or Hellhammer if their music got mixed with Horna or one of the other Lo-Fi Northern European Black Metal bands. They beat one riff into the floor, and with the typical “freezing cold/necro” production, much of this CD is headache-inducing. The sound quality is bad and what you are essentially getting is a demo that is not only a decade old, but also recorded using shitty equipment. If you love it “grim” and “freezing cold,” Draugwath delivers that by the ton. If you want or are expecting something better in either playing or production, look elsewhere. Fans of BlackDeath and connoisseurs of underproduced Black Metal will love this, everyone else will be selling this on eBay.

Power Metal.

I seriously have no idea what Odin sees in these San Francisco Black Metal bands. I don’t even know how he tells them apart. They all suck, and this one-man project is no exception. Feeble, noisy, bargain basement Black Metal with awful production. To describe this as “melancholic” is insulting, as this implies the notion of some kind of feeling other than going-through-the-motions. I guess this guy just needed some kind of aural representation to justify his insatiable need to put on corpse paint and spikes. All hail the new breed of 20th rate imitators.

Fast, melodic, and tight Swedish Death/Thrash with a slight Black Metal touch and full-time keyboards. Heavily recommended for fans of Norther and In Flames. Co-produced by Anders Friden at Studio Fredman.

Compared to their last release, Hate Campaign, this album has a decidedly retro feel to it. Hate Campaign was more melodic and polished, while this one has more in common with their first two albums. This is the Dismember that I remember from Like an Ever Flowing Stream and Pieces. The songs are markedly shorter and though there are still some melodic moments, this is pure brutality and aggression like the old shit. The songs range in length from around two and a half minutes long to just a hair over five. The result is an album that seems to go by a lot faster than it actually does. Where Ironcrosses Grow has few frills, no experimentation, and a whole lot of that good old-fashioned bludgeon-you-to-death-with-a-sledgehammer Death Fucking Metal that we all loved so much back in 1991. If you like that Swedish over-distorted sound a-la Sunlight Studios, you’ll fucking love this album.

Though this was released by Regimental Records, it is supposed to be a demo. Either way, it’s limited to 500 copies, which is probably 450 too many, considering how fucking awful this sounds. I imagine that Infernal Devastation might have been better if they’d actually spent some money and recorded it on something better than a “2-track analog” recorder. For those of us not in the know, a 2-track analog recorder is a boom box with a microphone attached to it. This CD is essentially a glorified rehearsal tape. If you’ve ever heard a badly recorded rehearsal tape, you’ll know exactly how this sounds. The drums are loud as fuck, the guitars are buried somewhere underneath everything and it sounds like it could have been recorded in the ’80s or early ’90s. The five songs on this CD are fairly hard to judge owing to the shit sound. It sounds like a Black Metal band trying to incorporate old Slayer riffs into their Bathory worship. This is a coaster, pure and simple. It’s a waste of money and there’s no nicer way to put it. To the folks at Regimental, either give these guys a budget to do a decent recording or don’t bother next time.

Hey, now I have something to listen to when I’m in the mood for keyboard-driven Power Glam sung in Spanish. Which I’m assuming is the same mood most folks are in when they decide to join NAMBLA. This record is the aural equivalent to having R. Kelly pee on you.

A second rate rip-off of equal parts Under a Funeral Moon-era Darkthrone and Nightwing-era Marduk from this one-man Swedish Black Metal band. At least he picks good bands and albums to steal from, and the playing, vocals, and drum programming are all done convincingly well. Still, why you would need this over the originals is a mystery to me.

This intro had really sparked my curiosity with it’s almost Katatonia-like atmosphere. Unfortunately the rest of the album is dated Bay Area-style Thrash with a vocalist who sounds like Dave Hewson with a touch of Downs and a harelip. Cool intro, though.

Not sure if a pro-love, pro-peace intro/sample from Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. is the best way to get someone psyched up for an ultra-violent Death Metal album, but I guess I can’t argue. These guys play brutal Death reminiscent of Butchered at Birth-era Cannibal Corpse, but with a touch more melody. The low growls are good, but not quite Immolation-good, while the high screams a la 2004 Chris Barnes tend to become a little annoying after a while. Overall this isn’t bad, just a little boring.

This split CD compiles six tracks each from two of the Bay Area’s one-man Black Metal bands (the Bay Area is also home to Draugar, yet another one-man Black Metal band). Of the two, Leviathan is more famous but Crebain is no less talented. Crebain main-man Ankalagon has more of a Trash/Death Metal background and while this is a solid slab of Black Metal, it does have a more Death/Thrash vibe to it. The music is more memorable and harder hitting than your average “beat one good riff into the ground” Black Metal band and the production gives Crebain a clear, heavier sound. The songs seem a little bit drawn out but they still kick substantial ass. Leviathan is also sporting a clearer sound than on their previous releases and it actually shows a different side of the band. The past three Leviathan releases have been much more in the Darkthrone vein, having an ugly, raw sound. Their half of this split seems more Emperor/Burzum inspired and has keyboards and a much more atmospheric sound while still remaining true to their older style. The only odd track on this split is a cover of “Blood Angel” (a Von track) done by Leviathan. It comes after a long, Ambient outro that rounded out their first five tracks. For those who know the Von sound, “Blood Angel” is faithful to it, down to the vocals. If this had been done prior to Leviathan’s fifth track (“Now Relic”), I wouldn’t have had a problem with it, but “Blood Angel” sounds like it was tacked on at the end as an afterthought.