Dizastor - After You Die We Mosh
Dublin, California’s Dizastor is a band that isn’t going to get critical acclaim anytime soon. Most will pan After You Die We Mosh as unimaginative and trivial music that’s essentially the special-ed version of old Exodus performed by a bunch of guys who are a few tacos short of a bargain ten-pack of Doritos Locos from Taco Bell. That said, most of those same people will be right in front of the stage thrashing around like a bunch of drunken lunatics the next time Dizastor rolls into their area and plays a show. To think of After You Die We Mosh as a serious Thrash album is to miss the point. Besides, how the fuck are you supposed to take a band seriously when they have songs like “I’ll Eat Your Children” and “Beer and Baloff Attack” on their album? The answer is that you aren’t. To hammer that point home, the band included five live tracks along with the eleven studio recordings. If you had any doubts about the fact that all these guys just want to do is get drunk as hell and play Thrash, the live tracks put that to rest immediately. Dizastor is a reminder that Thrash (and to a lesser degree, the rest of the Metal scene in its entirety) doesn’t need to be 100% serious all the time. If nothing else, After You Die We Mosh is an indication that, when you see the band play live, you’re going to have a good time. It’s laden with memorable riffs and simple lyrics that implant themselves in your skull and, like the worst form of Pop music, you’ll find yourself singing along to one of their songs at the most inappropriate moments. I’d like to take this time to apologize to that Comcast rep who had to listen to me singing part of “Carpool Drive By” while I was waiting for her to finish doing something. I’m probably responsible for at least a couple years of therapy at this point. As unserious as this is, it’s effective at what it does. Is it the best Thrash LP ever? Hardly. It isn’t meant to be. Is it fun to listen to? Fuck yeah.
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