What the fuck is this?!? Oh, man… where to even start? Okay, many years ago, when Rob Halford finally came out as being gay, I think that most of us said, “Yeah, no kidding. So what?” and when right back to listening to Painkiller or whatever. (Although the revelation, such as it was, did put a potential new spin on some of Rob’s lyrics.) When he later came out as a Jesus freak, I was disappointed to say the least, but tried to ignore it, hoping that he’d regain his senses. Last year’s Xmas album, Winter Songs, was a sad reminder, although the CD did melt into an interestingly shaped blob. And now, much to my dismay, Halford has come out yet again - this time as a NASCAR fan. Yes, fellow defenders of the Metal faith, Rob Halford has apparently overdosed on Vagisil. I am sorry to report that the song “Made of Metal” is about the uneducated redneck national pastime of driving around in a circle, turning only to the left (while somehow keeping their politics always so far to the right). What I had hoped was a sick joke is all too nauseatingly real. There have been several reviews over these many years wherein I have cried out for a vocal eliminator, but I am not tempted to do that now, as this band is almost literally nothing without the once-and-hopefully-future-Metal-God’s voice. But even his vocals here are generally weak, almost as if he just didn’t give a shit most of the time. That may be my own wishful thinking clouding my ears, though, since I certainly hope that Mr. Halford would aspire to better than this rubbish. Perhaps if the music itself kicked any ass on its own, at least something from this album could be salvaged, but this sounds like the worst, lamest of the unused castoffs from the last 20 years of Halford’s musical career (discounting the foray into Industrial, or whatever the dementia known as Two was supposed to be), although the final track, “The Mower,” is passable, sounding shockingly different than the others.
For those still not convinced (and who could blame you? I didn’t want to believe it, either!), “Till the Day I Die” is a Country song. Which I suppose explains the fascination with NASCAR and Jesus.
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Jon Konrath said:
Halford isn’t exactly a NASCAR fan - he’s a fan of the public restrooms at NASCAR events. I’ll let you do the math on why.
I would guess that he’s looking for Jesus.
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