Ihsahn - Eremita
Make a wish, a star is falling. And holy fuck do I mean far. I had a feeling when this former Emperor frontman began his pursuit of a solo career that things would not end up well. So far, said solo career has produced one essential song, and it owes more to Mikael Akerfeldt’s vocals than anything. Plus, let’s not forget the historical pattern of the Inner Circle’s Shemp: each album gets worse. Not sure how it’ll get any worse than Eremita, which can only be dissected via track-by-track analysis. Opener “Arrival” sounds a lot like a Stryper song, and not the really good Stryper songs like “Holy Trinity Four-Way” and “Takin’ My Saviour Balls Deep,” I mean their big-in-Japan era. “The Paranoid” is reminiscent of R&B group Jodeci with an Emperoresque tinge and a stunning guest guitar solo from Ralph Macchio. “Introspection” is the LP’s sincere Mr. Big moment, while “The Eagle and the Snake” is actually a cover from the Beverly Hills Cop soundtrack. I forget the artist, but then again haven’t we all? “Catharsis” is a collaboration co-written by Sully from Godsmack and Miles Davis, which features amazing guest timpani work from Scott Baio. “Something Out There” once again rekindles the Emperor church fires, albeit with a slight Barnum & Bailey Circus slant, while “Grief” is an instrumental dedicated to Fred Savage and Nancy Kerrigan. Remember Tackleberry from Police Academy? The gun-crazy cop? “The Grave” sounds a lot like his band did when Mahoney threw that party but sent the two dickhead cops to the gay bar instead. Which ties in perfectly to closer “Departure,” a New Wave take on the Blue Oyster Bar theme music featuring a duet with Amy Grant (who I’ve always wanted to fuck in the ass). I’m just kidding, folks. Eremita isn’t anywhere near that interesting. It’s total Prog garbage for lifeless souls. With ease, the worst album I’ve heard in 2012. Maybe ever.
(3) Comment(s)
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Koji Kabuto said:
That makes me want to hear this album, just to see how bad it really is…
OnlyInDeath said:
Album may be a 1, but this review gets 10+
Jon Konrath said:
I found a video of a song from this album here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tTJMerul33E
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